Me and my baby

Hello, everybody. I registered here just now, as I was googled how to make money. I feel really nervous because I never did this before, but the thing is that I dont have a choice, because otherwise I have to die from hunger. :) So this is my story - I am 29 years old mother of almost 2 year old boy. I used to live for a long tim, e in London, but from 2 years and a half I live in small german city. Two and a half years ago my ex received a good job offer and decided to move here, where and the baby came. Year later we seperated because a lot of things happened (what I can say is that I used to be left at home while he was smoking weed and drinking alchohol. Also a lot more.) Thats why we seperated but he offered me to stay here to take care of the baby, as I have to pay my part of the food and half of the rent + electricity. I didnt have any money or my apartment so I decided to accept this. Plus I knew it wouldnt be easy to fight for my baby withouth money. I decided to register it for a kindergarten and to try to find job as a english speaking, with no degree. :) I received around 220 money for the baby every month and 200 maternity and 300 from my parents for the rent. So when I used to pay 300 rent with around 60 - 100 electricity I was able at least to buy food, coffee , water and to have for the walks with the baby. My ex pays the baby food. I am still waiting now to receive a place in kita here 9 months. In Germany is like that. They stopped the naternity 5 months ago and they stopped the baby money 2 months ago because I didnt fill the letter which they sent to check , because I dont know german. Finding a job with no german and degree espetially in place like this is impossible. So I never lived poor like the last year but especially the last two months were... He usually eats outside and doesnt stay in the house a lot, so there is no food here, but even if it had, I am not aloud to eat it. I clean the house , take care for my baby , but its difficult when you cant afford food or a coffee in the morning. Last two months I had to collect plastic bottles from the parks to be able to survive. Also soon my baby have a birthday (2) and I cant buy even cake for it. I changed my names because I am worried not to be recognised I feel really ashamed. I will be very thankfull if somebody help me, thank you.