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Desperate to save my family
Hi. I feel very awkward asking/ begging for money. I never thought that I would be in this position. I have never really had alot, but I have always managed to make it work. I have always been such a strong person. I used to be able to go, non stop, it seemed. At the time, I didnt give it much thought. I am nowhere near the person that I used to be, and I want that person back. I have just sunk so low. I cannot get ahead. Everything changed around 7 years ago. When I lost my dad, it affected me in a way that I can't even describe. At the same time, I battled with health issues, and after over a year of doctor visits and hospital stays, I was diagnosed with 2 auto immune diseases. This has given me so much physical pain, but what is worse is the depression that I sank into. I have wasted several years of my life. I am trying desperately to get my life back. I want my life back. The financial mess that I have gotten myself into has made it feel impossible. Every day, I fall deeper into this hole, and I need help. If it were just me, I think I could live in my car. I could just walk away from my life. It may seem just rediculous to some, but I love my dogs. The thought of them becoming displaced or perhaps worse, breaks my heart. I am all they know. I am their mama. They love me. I dont ever want them to lose me, to think I have abandoned them, to wander what they did wrong, to think I dont love them. I am terrified that I am going to get a knock on the door, get forced out of my home, and what will become of my dogs. I wish I could get a loan, and if anyone would be willing to work out a loan with me, that would be great. I am here now, hoping that someone will help me. I have a fantasy. I dont think I have enough time to ever make it happen, but if I get out of the financial mess that I am in now, I would love to have a home with a little piece of land. Just enough to have privacy. A place where my dogs have alot of room to run, play, and just be dogs. No neighbors, so that a few barks will not annoy anyone. There is so much more to me than this.

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