11-06-2016, 01:36 AM
Please Help Me Gain My Independence
On Christmas Day 2007, I lost my wonderful son . He had suffered a fatal Epileptic seizure. It was a condition that had plagued him all of his 27 years. It was never really controlled by drugs and he had regular breakthrough seizures. This made finding work nearly impossible. However, he always persisted and did a lot of volunteer and courses that helped the local community in which we lived. His great love was gardening and getting close to nature. He was and still is my inspiration. Unfortunately, a short two years after he passed away, I myself suffered a seizure. I felt that my life had come to a grinding halt. I was tempted to ask why me? Why am I suffering so much?. I had the usual tests but I was not diagnosed with epilepsy until I had my second seizure about a year later. All I seemed to hear from doctors was what I could not do anymore!. Or maybe that was just my perception of it. However, I took their advice and the medication which made me feel like a totally different person , but not in a good way. I seemed to think differently and really felt like I had some sort of terrible disease. I continued with the medication, hoping that I would eventually start to feel like my old self. But I never really did. I did not have a job outside of the home. I was caring for my daughter and felt that was where I needed to be. Honestly, I was too scared for a while to go out on my own. I worried about what would happen to me if I had a seizure in public. Who would help me? Would I be robbed? Both legitimate worries I suppose at the time. I felt like I had just become this condition and I was being pushed aside. I came to an important decision after three years of being seizure free, I would gradually come off the medication to see how I was without it. I have now been off medications for about a year and am definitely feeling more like my old self. But now, I have been diagnosed with Osteoarthritis in my knees. It is quite bad and I will eventually need knee replacements.I have been to Physio and do the exercises and take the painkillers. But now, when I thought I could begin life again and look for a job, I am told by my doctor that I have to find a job where I don't sit too long or stand too long. I need regular breaks and time to take medications. As you may have guessed this has been somewhat difficult. You can't really ask for all these at an interview(if you get one) and expect an employer to give you all these perks when all they want is a person to do the job. My poor husband is currently working two jobs just so we can get by and I really want to contribute to our family and give him a well deserved break.Then, I had a brainstorm, I had been selling items from around our home on Ebay and had made a little money. But it was temporary as I ran out of items to sell. So I came up with the idea of raising some money online and selling items as a way of earning money. I will use the money to buy stock wholesale and sell it for a small markup. I wanted to get this started as soon as possible as we are facing a mountain of bills at the moment. This is my life and I do not like being this vulnerable. I am not used to asking for help.This has taken me two weeks to write as I am not used to talking about myself in such a personal way. I want to do this to prove to myself that I can do something that I am a capable person and I am not defined by any medical condition. I will be so very grateful for any contribution that anyone can make . And when I start to earn some money I will gladly pay it forward to another deserving person as I know that there are many people worse off than me in this world and that my story is not as desperate as a lot of people's but it would change my whole world if I could be independent once again. Thank you in advance for your help.