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I lost everything
#1
Sad 
Hello everybody. 
This may sound naive but I think this is already helping because I also needed to take this out of my chest.
I live in Spain, I won't say the exact place because this is kind of painful to share it would be worst to be pointed out.
Anyway, my life is not the biggest mess there is because I have my mother, some friends, and I am alive. But, cutting to the point, I have miscalculated entirely my economy, first by spending more than I should then trying to get back my money by playing online slots, yeah,casinos and all that.
The worst thing of those places is that sometimes you win some amount, then my mind fell in the trap so easily and I gambled more than 3 months of salary in 20 minutes (trying to get more) then lost it all.
I felt like I wanted to die, it's like you become your worst enemy. With that said I am now in a kind of horrible situation, as my father lent me money to pay the rent and I lost it gambling, right now I cannot pay this month's rent, bills and even food. 
Tomorrow I will go to pawn all my valuable belongings (phone and so on).
It's the last resource I think I have and I feel like all the people I could go to ask help is gone, so I really feel lost.
But maybe -if you are reading this- I am not alone at all.
If somebody could help me just a little, it would be a tremendous help and light of life.
I know there are people with worst things going on so I would understand not being helped at all but if you do be sure I would feel grateful and perhaps see the light. 
Thanks   
paypal.me/alexanderXs
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